Disasters and stupidity

[RogerH]

As I have progressed through life I have had a few lapses into stupidity that have been on the verge of disaster.

Today I did it again.  When doing iffy things I try to see what could go wrong and how quickly it would kill me.

So today I was doing an oil change (what could possibly go wrong)

I need to get the car onto the normal small ramps. As I was on my own rather than drive up, I jacked it up onto the ramps.

This was success full.  Oil drained and new filter fitted.

To get it off the ramps I decided to some how roll it down. I usually use the jacks to get it down but not this time (stupidity #1)

However not being totally stupid I realised that the car could roll down quickly and disappear acress the road.

So I put wooden 3 x3"  blocks in the way of the rear tyres and the front tyres. ZStupity #2

It took a bit of persuation to get it moving (more stupidity) but when it did move it became very enthisiastic very quickly.

Did this surprise me - well, yes.

Now a couple of things happened in very quick succession    

1, the rear tyres shot over the wooden chocks

2, I have hold of the front bumper and am being propelled through the air until I landed on a woodem chock that was not being used - using

my thigh as a cushion

    Did this hurt - yes, eventually very much

3,  The front tyre shot over its chock - now that was a surprise.

4,  I am now being dragged along my driveway - reminiscent of a scene from a silent movie.

Thankfully nobody was walkng behind the car as this was happening because it did get to the pavement.

I now realise that my left thigh is not happy with me - ouch!!!   It later developed quite a nice bruise.

It did stop.

I now had to get the car back onto the driveway.  Thankfully stupidity was replace with common sense ( a bit late)

Into 1st gear and used the starter motor and solenoid to run it forward.

I know exactly how I should have done but not at the right time. 

Will I ever learn - probably not.

 

Roger

[Hamish]

Jeez Roger

that was a close one I hope the leg recovers 

no damage to hips and knees ? Keep an eye on the bruise and make sure it goes down. 
 

( glad I’m not the only one to try short cuts - some you get away with some you don’t…..)

[Escadrille Ecosse]

PE = mgh  and can often be converted into  mv2  with surprising rapidity.

PE also comes in a variety of other flavours. Many of which also allow conversion at potentially hazardous rates 

Glad you survived the experience mostly intact Roger.

I will ocasionally do the same and jack the car up before setting it onto ramps. Based on experience I prefer to drive off them though for reasons intimated.

[JohnD]

Remind us of your Guardian Angel, Roger!     I'd like to hire them!

N o more close shaves, please, we want our travelogues, please!

John

[PaulAA]

Roger

Did you not discover that, by the time you reached the pavement, most people within a three mile radius were already on the other side of the street filming the action?

1 hour ago, Escadrille Ecosse said:

PE also comes in a variety of other flavours.

I believe there is a mathematical equation, which demonstrates that PE increases exponentially when its source is a scissor jack.

Paul

[Escadrille Ecosse]

Seems appropriate ....

[RogerH]

at least I wasn't wearing their attire when I was being scraped along the block paving in the driveway.

 

Slightly sore Roger

[BiTurbo228]

Eek!

I had a similar 'that was not very clever at all' moment a while ago. I'd jacked up the E36 I had at the time using the factory jack, just to bleed the brakes so I didn't bother to put an axle stand in (mistake number 1). It was on a fairly hard packed surface, but it was still gravelly (mistake number 2).

Cue me with my head in the wheel well sorting out the pipe for the bleeder. I knock over the empty wine bottle I was using to catch fluid, so duck back out to sort that. When I look back...the car's sitting on the ground.

Huh. I didn't leave that there.

What had happened was that the car had rolled backwards slightly, and as the factory jack is one of those 'pin poking into a box section' jobbies, it had just rotated around that and sat the car down as the base of it skated sideways on the gravelly bits. A moment earlier and it'd have taken me with it.

Now, I don't think I'd have ended up crushed underneath it or anything, but I'd definitely have been uncomfortably wedged in the wheel well.

Lifting cars man. Do it properly. Every time.

[Hamish]

I confess to being run over by my own (empty) trailer the jockey wheel end. 
I don’t stand or manoeuvre it down wind anymore. Push don’t pull.

i do put a wheel ( at least) under a jacked car. 
I’m a devil for sitting doing the job with my legs under the car as crouching is becoming a pain. 

Edited November 26 by Hamish

[RogerH]

Hi Simon

I do not think we should make babies together becauser the outcome would be a right stupid little bu99er.

Roger

[BiTurbo228]

Haha my 2yr old is smarter than me already 🙃

[JumpingFrog]

I've had my E91 fall off a scissor jack, the damn thing weighs a lot. I had the driver's rear jacked up to coax a binding caliper (mid-trip), and didn't have a wheel chock nor could I find anything suitable nearby. Big mistake, car park wasn't as level as it looked and after 5 minutes of being completely fine, the car suddenly decided to move - hand brake was off to check binding. Luckily my head wasn't in the wheel arch at the time. Cracked sill cover and bent brake back plate to show for all this, borrowed a bottle jack from a truck driver to get it off the floor. Sounds very stupid in hindsight, expecting a wheeled vehicle not to roll on a gradient.

At home I'm usually careful, never under a car without an axle stand... Scissor jacks are really the spawn of the devil, but the weight of a trolley jack in the boot is hard to justify.

Sometimes I think things like this go wrong to remind us not to get complacent. Hope your leg recovers Roger.

[Wolfrace.]

Triumphs are the devils chariot, see Damien’s TR7

[Nick Jones]

Congratulations on your survival-with-minimal-damage Roger. And thank you for admitting to it to remind us to be more careful!

Gravity….. always waiting for its opportunity 

[Sprint95m]

8 hours ago, Hamish said:

Push don’t pull.

 

Absolutely.

You are permitted to move assembled mobile access (scaffold) towers under certain conditions...
on level ground with the stabilising feet just clear of the ground AND you push, never pull!

Gravity is your friend if treated with respect 

 

Ian

[Sprint95m]

7 hours ago, JumpingFrog said:

I've had my E91 fall off a scissor jack, the damn thing weighs a lot. 

Easily done.

If I mind right, the tool kit supplied with Austin Princesses in the '70s came with a (pressed steel) wheel chock.
A good idea I thought.....

 

Ian

[Nick Jones]

1 hour ago, Sprint95m said:

You are permitted to move assembled mobile access (scaffold) towers under certain conditions...
on level ground with the stabilising feet just clear of the ground AND you push, never pull!

Hmm. Probably pulling a wobbly, overheight tower (without stabilisers) along from the top of it by pulling on the scaffolding tube lighting rail would be frowned on then……. And rightly so. Gravity not your friend under those conditions. Don’t ask how I know…. Was definitely very fortunate to avoid injury on that one.

[Spit131]

An example of ADVANCED stupidity ;

My parents very kindly used to  allow me to use my mums car when she did not need it . Minis in my late teen years .

There is the first example . ( Bless them ! )

Shamefully I might as well have taken them straight down to the Brands circuit , where I worked at the time , the way they were driven .

on one occasion I headed up a local hill to see a green line coach heading towards me down the hill . 
IRRELEVANT !! THE RULE WAS , that the car in front HAS to be overtaken .

Second example .

The coach driver clearly did not want to play this game . Fair play . He did not give an inch !

As a result I scrapped down the side of the coach .

No problem , it was dark , so I switched my lights off and fled . 

Third example .

A week later my father received a letter from The National Bus Co .

Dear ——- Sir , we are sure there will be a good explication , but your vehicle was seen driving away from the scene of an accident …..

It had not even dawned on me , that at that time , my father was the financial director of ‘ The National Bus Co ‘ 

ADVANCED example !!!!! 🤔

 

 

 

[Wolfrace.]

Triumphness….

 

Many years ago when I was a wan youth, our neighbour traded in his Vitesse saloon for a brand new charabang, a rather splendid 2.5pi saloon in a fetching yellow.

We were all agog and gathered around to admire this new chariot, much beloved of  the Police at the time and famous for its spectacular performer.

Time to go in for dinner, so young Phelps Jr asked Phelps Sr if he could put the car in the garage as was his evening want. Certainly said Sr.

Now, these houses were sited on a steep bank and the double garage was underneath and accessed by a ramp.

Young Phelps jumped into the 2.5, drove forwards and dissapeared out of sight down the ramp - followed quickly by a rather loud bang. Everyone dashed down the ramp to see the Pi hissing and leaking, its now rather restyled nose embedded in the back wall.

alas, young Phelps used to turn the ignition off as he coasted down, not a problem in the strictly mechanically braked Vitesse, the servo assisted PI? T’was Not a happy day.

 

 

 

[mattius]

I watched my dad break a couple of fingers using deathtrap stick spring compressors which must have been made before i was born.

Determined he must have been using them wrong, i followed suite and did the exact same thing.

A&E was funny, the doctors tried their best to keep a straight face as the two of us, with opposing hands wrapped in bandages presented themselves. But they all broke down in tears of laughter after a few minutes.

I like to think we brought some light amusement to a dull day.

[mossmonaco]

5 hours ago, Sprint95m said:

Easily done.

If I mind right, the tool kit supplied with Austin Princesses in the '70s came with a (pressed steel) wheel chock.
A good idea I thought.....

 

Ian

I'm fairly sure I remember one of those being in the kit with a triumph  1300fwd I had in my student days. It could have been in a 1750 maxi I had later but think it was the 1300. I was never sure if it was supplied for use when jacking or if it was designated as part of the handbrake system for normal use.......

[JohnD]

A favourite car of mine was, many years ago, an Isuzu Piazza

The scissor jack in  that came with a pair of wheel chocks.

JOhn

Edited November 27 by JohnD

[BiTurbo228]

@JohnD I knew I'd seen one for sale somewhere but it took me a while to find it:

https://www.facebook.com/share/p/17ai27axxx/

Not exactly common back in the day and really quite rare indeed now.

Edited December 3 by BiTurbo228