Reproduced from this weeks Private Eye.
"Bell-ending may be regarded by many Swedes as as a harmless joke"a spokesperson for the Rikspollisstyrelson told reporters in Stockholm."but Farbors Blas filthy actions have damaged the reputation of the police.He boasted on his blog that he and a fellow police officer had wiped the tips of there sex organs against the controls of a car driven by female co-workers,and his claim has caused widespread offence and disgust within the force.
"Our staff disciplinary board has considered the matter,and has decided to dismiss the officer with immediate effect".
The practice of Bell-Ending or `Ollning` (from Ollon)the Swedish for gland,involves a man touching an object with the tip of his penis,and has established itself as a recurring form of practical joke in Sweden.Writing under the pseudonym Farbror Bla(Uncle Blue),the police officer had revealed that "me and my buddy bell-ended the door handles,window buttons,gear stick,stereo buttons and the police radio buttons,as well as the receiver used to talk to the operations room.When the girls had driven around for an hour or so in the bell-ended police car ,we had a chat with them and revealed our`Ollning exploits`.Now we know what an expression of anxiety looks like.